Cover
About the Book
About the Author
Title Page
Dedication
ADVICE
‘Unaccustomed as I am ...’
Seize the day
It’s a celebration!
You’re the icing not the cake
The wedding may be unconventional ...
... But the principles of speeches are a constant
BEAR IN MIND
Feel the love
Play the generation game
Marry the two families
What’s in a name?
The embarrassing question
Keep it short
COMPOSE IT
Start thinking
MIND MAP
MIND MAP to FILL IN
Begin by saying thank you!
Tell a story not a joke
Hang it by a thread
Writing your speech? ... It’s as easy as 1,2,3
Write to be heard
The art of the story
Use poetry as your voice
Pick your poem
A selection of poets and poetry
The poetry reading
Make it memorable
End on a high note
D-DAY DELIVERY
Enjoy the moment
A question of confidence
Conquer ... uh ... uh ... the nerves
It’s not just a space, it’s a stage
Take a deep breath
Your chance to shine
Look out
Without signposts you’re lost
If music be the food of love
Magic of the pause
EXCEL YOURSELF
Rehearsal: Take one, Take two, Take three
Get a sense of direction
I do’s
I don’ts
Trivia to trifle with
FOR EVERYONE
Who speaks about whom
The 60 second speech demonstration
The Parents or Hosts
The Couple
The Best Man or Best Woman
The Best of the Rest
The Impromptu speaker
Master of Ceremonies
Why quote a quote?
Lover to lover
All about love
Love bites
Acknowledgements
Design Team
Copyright
Congratulations! Either you or someone close to you is getting married!
Before the panic of realising you’ll have to make a speech sets in, rest assured that this book is your complete guide to writing, performing – and enjoying! – the moment.
Whether you’re a bride, groom, father, mother, best man or woman...
From big weddings to small, religious ones to humanist, second marriages, straight or same sex...
Unaccustomed As I Am... will show you how to give the wedding speech to end ALL wedding speeches.
Michael Parker is the author of the bestselling book on how to present yourself when it really matters, ‘It’s not what you say, it’s the way you say it!’
Having written numerous speeches, coached individuals in pitching and presentations, he is brilliantly equipped to share his tips, tricks and tools on delivering the best wedding speech ever. www.pitchcoach.co.uk
If you’re giving a wedding speech, even if you’re not one of the lucky couple, it’s your Big Day too.
There’s a lot of pressure on you. Where to start?
You can’t wing it. It needs careful research and thought to decide just what it is that you want to say, to make it interesting and memorable. You will need to feel comfortable and relaxed about delivering it, so you will enjoy it as much as your audience.
While you are not yet a confident public speaker, you will find that the skills you practice naturally in everyday conversation are exactly what you need to make a winning speech.
‘There are two types of speakers: those who get nervous and those who are liars.’ MARK TWAIN
One of the most well-known movie quotes was spoken by Robin Williams in Dead Poets Society: ‘Carpe Diem, Seize the day, boys. Make your lives extraordinary.’
Your speech may not change your life but it is a chance to do something extraordinary, a chance to enjoy showing off and to employ kairos.
Kairos is a classic rhetorical concept, used by many great orators, from Martin Luther King to Barack Obama, to capture in words the timeliness and the atmosphere of a particular moment.
Weddings are just such moments. Say the right thing for this particular moment in time and place and the audience will be yours.
‘Thus though we cannot make our sun
Stand still, yet will we make him run.’
Andrew Marvell
Every moment of the Big Day is one of celebration. It’s an opportunity to congratulate and honour the happy couple, show admiration and sing their praises.
Each speech may have a different role, but all will have at their heart the spirit of praise and thanks, the feel-good factor.